Nate W asked:
My wife and I have a five-month-old, so our love life has kind of gone by the wayside. She craves more romance and fun flirtiness, etc,-like we had when we were first dating. And I want to give it to her, but I’ve lost some of my creativity.
My wife and I have a five-month-old, so our love life has kind of gone by the wayside. She craves more romance and fun flirtiness, etc,-like we had when we were first dating. And I want to give it to her, but I’ve lost some of my creativity.
Money is extremely tight right now as she’s a stay-at-home mom, so what do you suggest for fun and romantic (and cheap or free) date ideas to surprise her with? Also, it would be good to also have ideas that involve bringing our baby along.
Thanks!
Author:
April 24th, 2008 at 11:55 am
take her to whitecastles for onion rings
April 27th, 2008 at 11:24 pm
Take her out on a picnic with the baby. Take a walk as you stroll the baby along in a stroller.
May 1st, 2008 at 12:13 am
1.Cook dinner for her
2. Sing to her
3. Take a shower with her and wash her hair
4. Love letters
5. Cards tucked in places where she’ll find them later (in the fridge under pillows, etc.)
6. Foot massage
7. Playground dates/picnics
Have fun!
May 3rd, 2008 at 9:45 pm
Put the baby down for the night and rent a movie.
Trade babysitting with another couple for an evening (you’ll take their kids sometime) and go out for ice cream
Recreate your first date. Go outside and ring the doorbell and ask for her, then go out.
Make a nice dinner together.
Sorry, I don’t have a lot of suggestions. Been married too long, I guess!
May 6th, 2008 at 12:27 am
Camping is what my wife and i did. it cost us about $30 duck and are son had a great time in his crib. my wife and i where able to talk and enjoy each other under the stars.
May 8th, 2008 at 11:13 pm
FYI, bringing the baby along is fine but it is not a date and it will not feel like when you were first dating! ! ! You didn’t have a 5 month when dating!
Just from my experience some of the best things you can do is the dishes, laundry, clean the house, and take Jr. on a little walk so mommy can take a nap or a bath. THEN the wife will be happy if you take her to McDonald’s after you do those things for her!
You need to find another couple that you can trade off nights with so you can go out alone with your wife. Then a walk in a park or a picnic will not cost much and you can spend time talking!
Good Luck
May 12th, 2008 at 2:31 am
I remember being right where you are. I would prepare our pick nick basket, swimsuits, towel beach, change of clothing. We would go play mini golf in the afternoon, have a pick nick by the lake then after supper we would go to the drive-in watch a movie. We did all that with our 3 month old baby with us.
May 12th, 2008 at 2:51 pm
You have an infant that sleeps alot….Set the bedroom mood…..stay home and have sex……cheapest solution…..
May 13th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
Find the closest park with a gorge or rock formation. They are beautiful, you can walk even with a stroller, through the park and look at all the beauty around you. Take a picnic lunch, eat at a picnic area or anywhere that there’s a place to sit and then just walk through and look around and watch the animals.
It’s very romantic, there are things to see and talk about and you will all be relaxed by the atmosphere.
That night have a movie night/sleepover: go to your library’s website (ahead of time) and find movies that you would like to see and request transfers to your local library. They’ll be there in a couple of days and you can get them for free. Yes, they do have recent movie releases.
Buy some microwave popcorn (Orville Redenbacher’s Kettle Corn mmmm)
Make some chocolate chip cookies, put on your jammies and have a sleepover with your wife.
Lotsa fun.
May 16th, 2008 at 9:19 pm
Buy a cheap picnic basket and pack it w/finger foods and fruits (and whip cream)
Get a blanket, some candles, soft music and have a picnic right on your living room floor feeding each other! I did this for my husband as a birthday gift and he loved it! Uh… careful though, don’t make another baby! 
May 17th, 2008 at 5:09 pm
Check your local newspaper…where I live we have summer movies in the park by the river..and they are free. You bring blankets, let the kids play or go to sleep and when sunsets they start a movie. You can bring in snacks or a picnic dinner.
You can also rent some movies…when the baby goes to bed (or better yet, find a sitter for a few hours or over night) snuggle up together and watch the first movie you ever watched together or an old favorite..or even a new one since it may be a while before you can watch one again!
Run her a bubble bath and light candles…while she’s getting in, try to get the baby down and then go in and join her!!
But seriously, check the papers, there are usually plenty of activities listed for the summer.
May 18th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
Picnic!
Or candlelit dinner at home, after baby falls asleep.
Hiking - just use one of those baby packs, and wear the baby.
Water balloons in your own backyard.
Share a bath.
YOU cook for her, and clean up too - she will find that so sexy!
Best wishes to you.
May 20th, 2008 at 1:01 pm
A candle light dinner at home, It doesn’t take much grey matter to make spaghetti and serve it with wine, some bread and a nice salad under candle light.
May 20th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
walks (with the baby in a stroller)
if you are by an airport you can go sit by the water and watch the planes (if its a nice view)
you could go to jazz club….nice atmosphere there (no baby though) and not so pricey
most zoos are free, well the one here in DC is, but still not a lot and you can bring the babe
May 21st, 2008 at 9:13 am
For just the two of you. Get one of the grand parents to watch the littleone for the afternoon. Pack a picnic basket with a blanket, and rent a canoe. Stroll along the river a while, until you find a nice quite, and secluded spot. Enjoy lunch, and maybe a little more. This could be one of those charished times to remember as time passes by.
As for a time with the little one with you. A drive-in movie can be fun, or a simple trip to the park. It’s not that you spend a lot of cash, or anything. Its about developing the realization to your spouse, that she’s the only one you wish to be with.
Give her your undivided attention.
May 21st, 2008 at 11:34 am
I complete understand what you are going through! Its a tough time (and gets even HARDER if/when you have a 2nd! lol) Here are some of the things my husband and I did:
**Karaoke night (sometimes you can even find “family friendly” joints)!
**Subscribe to a online movie rental place like Blockbuster and have a movie night at LEAST once a week. We put the kids to be early, open a bottle of wine, turn on our gas logs (if its winter), make some popcorn and snuggle while watching a flick! Each week we take turns choosing the movie!
**Go “parking!” Sure you have a house and you arent kids anymore.. but that doesnt make it any LESS fun!! It will actually bring that danger and excitment back into the relationship!!
**Save some money and take her to a chalet in the mountains (or beach whichever is closer) for a weekend WITHOUT baby!! It might not be right away but by the time you get to go, she will be SOOO ready to have an “adult” weekend!!
**Find out what shows are playing at your local theatres.. if they are local shows, they usually dont cost much and its a fun way to “kill” time! (And by “shows” I’m talking plays or ballets or symphonies… NOT the movies, although thats ALWAYS a good old “standard!” LOL)
**Take her to the place that you two shared your first date… or the place you asked her to marry you… say all the sweet and romantic things you feel and KNOW she would love to hear!! Propose to her all over again (or tell her that you would marry her again in a heartbeat!)
**Take her go cart racing or to an amuzement park… again.. we arent kids but that doesnt mean we stop wanting to have FUN!
**Send HER out for a manicure or pedicure or a massage while YOU stay at home w/ the little one! It may not be something you do TOGETHER but I can BET that she will THANK you for it later!!
**Find a babysitter one night (for the ENTIRE night), go to an adult bookstore and have fun looking and laughing at all the WEIRD and disturbing things that they have!! It can really be a BLAST! Then pick a few choice things out to buy, go home and have a FUN night “playing!!”
**Get a hotel room for the night (even if its just right down the street) and PAMPER her!! Get some oils to give her a massage, see if you can get a room w/ a jacuzzi tub, and just RELAX knowing that NO ONE has to get up for 4 o clock feedings and you both get to sleep in!!
**Start HOSTING a “game night” with your friends. Thats what we do EVERY Tuesday night! We have about 5-10 of our friends come over and we either play cards or board games. We sit, drink, talk, laugh and just ENJOY the adult conversation! All the while our kids are upstairs and in bed!! Its MUCH more convienient to have your friends come to YOU at this point and they SHOULD understand! It really is a LOT of fun! You get the added bonus of becoming closer to your friends too!!
Other things that you can do for HER are giving her a couple nights off… YOU do the nighttime feedings (if she is breast feeding, have her pump before she goes to sleep). Also, give her some mornings off… YOU get up w/ baby. You could even make her breakfast in bed and tell her to just relax and watch some TV while she wakes up and drinks her coffee… tell her not to worry.. you and the baby are FINE!! Set up a “date” with one of her girlfriends and YOU pay for it! Maybe they can go out to see a “chick flick” or something!
Just remember that since she is a SAHM, night out WITH baby arent exactly HER idea of “time off” or fun! We LOVE our children.. but we are on duty 24/7 and when we get a chance to go out and have fun… well, we dont want our kids tagging along!!
Probably what she really wants is for you to just “take over” every now and then, show her how much you APPRECIATE her, YOU do the dishes and cleaning (to surprise her) once in a while, tell her how much you LOVE her and how WONDERFUL of a mommy and wife she is (how PROUD you are of her) and just SNUGGLE with her!! Thats all we need… a bit of help, a lot of love, and some APPRECIATION for all that we do (and NONE of those things cost one penny!!)
Also… one other thing to remember… the two of you CHOSE each other… dont EVER forget that, and ALWAYS do whatever it takes to keep the romance alive! Dont put ALL of your energy into the kids so that you have none left for one another. NO ONE will benefit from that!!
What my hubby and I do is once a year we take a vacation JUST THE TWO OF US!! We usually take a cruise for a week where there are NO phones, no way to even communicate except when we check into a port every now and then, and nothing to do but spend time “getting to know” each other again! It does WONDERS for our relationship.. and 6 yrs into our marriage (w/ 3 kids) and I would bet that we are actually CLOSER and MORE IN LOVE now then before all the stress!! (go figure LOL)
Also, another thing that we do is save ALL OUR CHANGE from the entire year! We have a HUGE jar that we keep it all in and we add to it EVERY DAY. Then at the end of the year (usually the first week of December) we roll all the change, count it up and use it to rent a chalet in the mountains for a weekend (JUST US). The change usually adds up to a good $300 or more! PLENTY of $$ for the trip (and we dont have to “dip” into Cmas money!)
I really hope that some of the ideas helped! I think that its GREAT that you are actually TRYING to come up w/ things on your own instead of having HER plan your nights together too… she does enough already… its great that YOU are taking the initiative!
GOOD JOB DADDY and KEEP IT UP!!
I hope that you two have MANY fun “adult only” nights to come!!
OH!! Also.. when Halloween rolls around, find a local movie theatre that is playing the Rocky Horror Picture Show (where EVERYONE dresses up!) Most places will have a little “show” before the movie OR will actually ACT OUT the movie in the front as its playing behind them on the screen! Make sure to bring an umbrella, a piece of toast and a few of the other things that are in the movie! We did that once and it was HILARIOUS!! They actually MADE me come down front (before the movie started) and show everyone how to put a condom on a banana!! HA HA HA! Its something differant and you’ll DEFINATELY laugh a lot that night!
May 22nd, 2008 at 3:52 am
Make her a coupon book. Like redeem for 20 min. massage, good for 1 sexual favor, good for 1 breakfast in bed, etc.