The name of the game is communication! Never go for the ol’ “dinner & movie” routine because neither one of these activities allow for communication. Think about it (dinner = stuff your mouth with food. No talking. movie = no talking during the movie.)
How about: Bowling, mini-golf, a day at a park, go play laser tag, go dancing, take dance lessons together, go to the gym together and be a “spotter” for her when she is using exercise equipment and help her with working out, etc.? Remember, anything that encourages communication!
I`m not a man, but I`m in your age bracket so I`ll give you my opinion….why not ask the lady what she would like to do. A lot depends on where you live and what is available for entertainment. Personally, I enjoy dancing and maybe having a drink at a nice club that doesn`t cater to the 21 yr. olds. Nothing wrong with dinner and a movie, but sometimes I like being asked what I want to do. Often my answer is, lets watch TV or rent a movie and order in a pizza at my place.
First of all, keep it light, funny, and to the point. By the time you have reached this age everyone you are dating has been in at least a couple serious relationships. First of all, seem busy. Say you would like to meet for a drink on a weekday afternoon. I suggest getting some beers at a divey-cozy joint right after work, asking her about her job (she’ll still be in the work mode and talkative), pretend like you give a crap, and don’t say much about yourself (yet). When conversation lightens up suggest a pinball game and order more beer (for her too, duh). When she gets a buzz on, casually bring up her past relationships and cautiously find out exactly why she isn’t in one [hopefully] now. This information will allow you to either bail out immediately or [pretend that you are not at all like her ex] and seem concerned, moving you into a “good listener” Romeo.
If you are into each other, offer dinner. Go somewhere kind of loud, close by, and casual. Suggest taking the long way and walking. Stroll and talk about whatever comes up because silence doesn’t seem uncomfortable when you are walking. You will find something that sparks her interest and give more conversation for dinner. More beers, listening, and then go home (with her if you aren’t interested in dating again) and wait for her to call.
That is less cheesy than laser tag, more modern than a malt with 2 straws, and makes you seem real. Hopefully you are
So, like red rose I am also not a man but I have been following this with interest (my divorced cousin Randy, 36, is just getting back into the dating scene and I told him I’d help him out, so I’m just looking stuff up for him). Anyways, as a woman who is also in her 30s and has dated enough to know, I had to present some other option to that ludicrous nonsense in the most recent post. Boys, the reality is it does not matter what you do on your date, as long as you are genuine about it. All this finagling and pretending like you care - I will let you in on a secret from the Book of Women: we can see right through that crap. We *know* when you’re just feigning interest and we *won’t* call you back. We also can tell a contrived date from a real one. We like the real ones much better. One of the points of a relationship is to do things together that you genuinely like, and maybe you share each others interests a lot or just a bit, but either way it’s good to share things that you know. Or want to try. So if you really do dig bowling, or aspire to be the next whoever is famous in bowling, take her bowling. If you have your PhD in comic books, take her to the next Batman and tell her how much better heath ledger’s joker is than jack nicholson’s. If you are a musician, show her how to play the bass guitar (that one’s easy to learn - a guy did that for me once and it was one of my best date things i’ve ever done). Or if you actually are the best spotter in the gym, and I can’t believe I am saying this but i mean it, take her to lift some weights. She will appreciate seeing what you enjoy and trying it out too, if you genuinely want to show her your good time. And then, if you do hit it off, ask her what she likes to do - like red rose said a couple of posts ago, it feels really good to be asked what you’re interested in doing, as long as you actually mean that and are not just asking out of laziness at planning your own date, or fear that you’re own interests are too dorky, or whatever. Believe it or not, we very often have our very own interests that can be fun and cool.
That, my friends, will be more modern than a malt with two straws. And speaking of which, i have to really put in a vote for the old-fashioned lady and the tramp single-strand-of-spaghetti/chocolate malted milkshake/mango lassi/whatever it is that you eat in this modern age of the dietary restriction date scenario. I am by no definition a traditionalist (i’m actually an economist, and therefore well into the modern age where women have the power to generate our own income, etc) but dumb stuff like that is really good for dates, and can make people laugh. If you can pull off sharing a strand of spaghetti, and she’s the kind of girl that can appreciate it, she will dig you for life.
so go and be the real people that the last guy was on about - he got that part right, at least.
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December 6th, 2007 at 2:48 pm
mcdonalds and a night by the tv?
December 9th, 2007 at 3:11 am
live performances; theme parks; takin a dance class; sightseeing; or just walking through a nice part of town or a park
December 10th, 2007 at 10:16 am
The name of the game is communication! Never go for the ol’ “dinner & movie” routine because neither one of these activities allow for communication. Think about it (dinner = stuff your mouth with food. No talking. movie = no talking during the movie.)
How about: Bowling, mini-golf, a day at a park, go play laser tag, go dancing, take dance lessons together, go to the gym together and be a “spotter” for her when she is using exercise equipment and help her with working out, etc.? Remember, anything that encourages communication!
December 10th, 2007 at 6:25 pm
Starbucks for the first date.No point in going all out on the first date..If things work out splurge for the second date.
December 12th, 2007 at 7:42 pm
I`m not a man, but I`m in your age bracket so I`ll give you my opinion….why not ask the lady what she would like to do. A lot depends on where you live and what is available for entertainment. Personally, I enjoy dancing and maybe having a drink at a nice club that doesn`t cater to the 21 yr. olds. Nothing wrong with dinner and a movie, but sometimes I like being asked what I want to do. Often my answer is, lets watch TV or rent a movie and order in a pizza at my place.
December 15th, 2007 at 5:44 pm
First of all, keep it light, funny, and to the point. By the time you have reached this age everyone you are dating has been in at least a couple serious relationships. First of all, seem busy. Say you would like to meet for a drink on a weekday afternoon. I suggest getting some beers at a divey-cozy joint right after work, asking her about her job (she’ll still be in the work mode and talkative), pretend like you give a crap, and don’t say much about yourself (yet). When conversation lightens up suggest a pinball game and order more beer (for her too, duh). When she gets a buzz on, casually bring up her past relationships and cautiously find out exactly why she isn’t in one [hopefully] now. This information will allow you to either bail out immediately or [pretend that you are not at all like her ex] and seem concerned, moving you into a “good listener” Romeo.
If you are into each other, offer dinner. Go somewhere kind of loud, close by, and casual. Suggest taking the long way and walking. Stroll and talk about whatever comes up because silence doesn’t seem uncomfortable when you are walking. You will find something that sparks her interest and give more conversation for dinner. More beers, listening, and then go home (with her if you aren’t interested in dating again) and wait for her to call.
That is less cheesy than laser tag, more modern than a malt with 2 straws, and makes you seem real. Hopefully you are
December 16th, 2007 at 1:46 am
So, like red rose I am also not a man but I have been following this with interest (my divorced cousin Randy, 36, is just getting back into the dating scene and I told him I’d help him out, so I’m just looking stuff up for him). Anyways, as a woman who is also in her 30s and has dated enough to know, I had to present some other option to that ludicrous nonsense in the most recent post. Boys, the reality is it does not matter what you do on your date, as long as you are genuine about it. All this finagling and pretending like you care - I will let you in on a secret from the Book of Women: we can see right through that crap. We *know* when you’re just feigning interest and we *won’t* call you back. We also can tell a contrived date from a real one. We like the real ones much better. One of the points of a relationship is to do things together that you genuinely like, and maybe you share each others interests a lot or just a bit, but either way it’s good to share things that you know. Or want to try. So if you really do dig bowling, or aspire to be the next whoever is famous in bowling, take her bowling. If you have your PhD in comic books, take her to the next Batman and tell her how much better heath ledger’s joker is than jack nicholson’s. If you are a musician, show her how to play the bass guitar (that one’s easy to learn - a guy did that for me once and it was one of my best date things i’ve ever done). Or if you actually are the best spotter in the gym, and I can’t believe I am saying this but i mean it, take her to lift some weights. She will appreciate seeing what you enjoy and trying it out too, if you genuinely want to show her your good time. And then, if you do hit it off, ask her what she likes to do - like red rose said a couple of posts ago, it feels really good to be asked what you’re interested in doing, as long as you actually mean that and are not just asking out of laziness at planning your own date, or fear that you’re own interests are too dorky, or whatever. Believe it or not, we very often have our very own interests that can be fun and cool.
That, my friends, will be more modern than a malt with two straws. And speaking of which, i have to really put in a vote for the old-fashioned lady and the tramp single-strand-of-spaghetti/chocolate malted milkshake/mango lassi/whatever it is that you eat in this modern age of the dietary restriction date scenario. I am by no definition a traditionalist (i’m actually an economist, and therefore well into the modern age where women have the power to generate our own income, etc) but dumb stuff like that is really good for dates, and can make people laugh. If you can pull off sharing a strand of spaghetti, and she’s the kind of girl that can appreciate it, she will dig you for life.
so go and be the real people that the last guy was on about - he got that part right, at least.